Join The “I Hated WALL.E” Fan Club: Membership So Far: 2

I was one of the few people in the country who hated Forrest Gump, so why break tradition now? I did not like WALL.E either. I’ll admit, the preview had already turned me off because I saw it too many times and like all previews, it gave far too much away. But then, I had no desire to see Toy Story when it came out and when a friend dragged me into the theater to see it anyway, I absolutely loved it. That is usually my story where animation is concerned. I have no initial impulse to see the movie, but I enjoy it once I do. That did not happen this time. Although visually impressive and certainly creative, WALL.E had a mediocre story. It tried very hard to have heart but I was more aware of the effort than the result. As for the dialogue? What dialogue?
OK. OK. There was some. In fact, here it is:

“WALLIE !
“Eva!
“Wallie!
“Eva!”

This dialogue must have been supplied by the guy who wrote the lyrics to the television theme song for Batman. Actually, when the human characters talked, we heard a little more, namely a message that people who do not work or exercise will get fat. Did I need to pay eight dollars to learn that?

My girlfriend talked me into seeing this because she heard how wonderful it was. I decided to be a good sport and go along. I have proven my devotion to her in full. She now knows I would swim the deepest stream for her or take a bullet for her because I would have rather done either of those, than sit through this boring maze of catatonic catastrophe. Boy, there’s a couple of hours out of my life Ill never have back again.

I’m in the minority here. If you find yourself liking the movie, don’t blame me for having a dissenting opinion. It is my right as an American. They may someday make it against the law to speak ill of homosexuals or to critique Islam, but by golly, my thoughts on movies will remain my own! On the other hand, if you find yourself as traumatized as I was, just remember, you were warned.

Oh, by the way, my girl friend hated it too, bless her heart. Relationships thrive when people share something in common.