If Up is Down and Down is Up, Maybe Up is Still Up

Originally published Friday, April 04, 2008

This week, one of Oprah Winfrey’s guests was a pregnant man. Are you feeling just a bit confused? Let me explain. He’s not exactly a man as you would understand the gender. He’s a woman who had a sex change operation and became a man. Still a little confused? Evidently some of the female plumbing is still around, at least enough for him to carry an artificially inseminated baby in the womb.

When subjects like this come up, I just can’t resist asking these obvious, boneheaded, non- Politically Correct questions, so please be patient and indulge me: If this woman really wanted to be a man why does he/she now want to have a baby? Isn’t that a desire associated with womanhood?

I can’t help but be reminded of another news story from a few years ago. You will think I’m making this up, but it’s absolutely true. A man claimed to be a male lesbian.

“What is a male lesbian?” you ask.

Good question. A male lesbian is a woman in a man’s body, a female brain, and a male body. However (and this is very important) the particular kind of female brain is lesbian. What is the difference between a lesbian female brain and a heterosexual female brain? Well, the lesbian brain is attracted to other women, not men. Are you catching the incredible fluke of nature here? What it all adds up to is a brain inside a male body that is attracted to females. What? You say you can’t see the difference between him and any other male? You are tempted to just call him a male and disregard the term “male lesbian.?” Man oh man! Get with the times! Stop being so insensitive and homophobic!

Reality check: Sometimes even the people who are trying to turn normalcy on its head betray themselves and reveal how normal they truly are.