Originally written 4-1-10:
In an unprecedented press conference, President Obama gave some announcements that invoked immediate gasps from the crowd of stunned and startled reporters. Since that moment, all of Washington has been in a buzz as talking heads and spectators try to figure out just exactly what brought on the change. This morning, at an 8:00 AM Press Club gathering, President Obama calmly stated that he is tired of the public perception that he somehow disrespects his own country. “Maybe I made a mistake going out on that world tour last year, ” Obama said earnestly to a group of bewildered looking Washington correspondents, “I only meant to improve our relations over sensitive issues but it was accidentally interpreted as an apology for America and this is a tragedy. Let me be clear: America has nothing to apologize for. Absolutely nothing. The world owes us time and time again. How many of our critics would even be alive right now if the United States had not bailed them out over the years? Our policies do not breed terrorism, neither does Guantanamo Bay, and for that matter, neither does Israel. The very idea that Muslim terrorists are striking around the world simply because the Jews built some apartments in their own capital city should look like complete insanity to any thinking person. So let’s stop spreading this nonsense once and for all. The fuel for Al Qaeda is their own hateful religion and its commands of Jihad. It is not America. It is not Israel.”
While seeming to be on a roll, President Obama continued to unleash some further sentiments that may have been bottled up for quite some time, “Since we are on the subject of blame, the statute of limitations has also run out on George Bush. No more claiming that I’m cleaning up George Bush’s mess. I have been president for almost a year and a half now. If there is a mess, it is my own responsibility.”
The president also acknowledged that higher taxes and mandatory redistribution of wealth did not seem to be working in favor of a robust economy. “We’ve taken over the banks. We’ve taken over the auto industry. And yet, things are more financially precarious than ever. It’s just not working. The time has come to stop demonizing Capitalism.”
When asked if his own advisers and czars may have contributed toward the crippling of America, President Obama replied, “That has certainly proven to be the case, which is why I am firing these Marxists before it is too late.”
OK. You must be catching on by now…………………………………………………………………………………………………..
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……………………..A P R I L F O O l !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But tell the truth: Didn’t it give you just a taste of what it might feel like to actually have a man of integrity in the White House? Come 2012. Come Quickly.
NOTE: Shortly after this piece was published on Town Hall, portions got picked up by NPR.com and USA Today.com. quoting Obama as if this story were true. Although this was probably due only to an automatic computer selection responding to the live RSS feed, it still made for interesting discussion.
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