Drive-Throughs Aren’t Really That Much Faster, Are They?

You just have love these drive-through hamburger joints such as Wendy’s or Jack in the Box. The other day my car was behind a mother with a van and a couple of kids (never a good sign) and I kid you not, it took her some 15 minutes to order. This is because her order was a special one, and she wanted to make very certain that all the subtle nuances were clear.

You know the kind of thing I’m talking about: “Two Number Ones. On the first one, hold the tomato and hold the mayo. But extra lettuce please and two pickles. On the second, we want the tomato and the mayo and also extra lettuce but no ketchup or mustard. Then, instead of a small soda, we want two medium milkshakes, one of them chocolate, the other half chocolate and half strawberry. Then we’ll also have a Number Two, only I don’t want it as a cheeseburger, just as a hamburger. I know it’s supposed to be a bacon-cheese burger but I can’t eat cheese due to allergies. I do want the bacon though, which is why I’m still ordering a Number Two, but could you only put on one piece? Because I won’t eat two pieces. Then…Um…Ah…Let’s see, what kinds of diet drinks do you have?…Oh..Just give me a Mountain Dew. And then, can I exchange the fries for onion rings? Oh, extra napkins and five packs of salt.”

Of course, this well thought out discourse is being relayed to a clerk who doesn’t speak a word of English anyway. The ambitious customer could have been ordering one cup of coffee for all the difference it made.

And that’s the latest from Bob’s experience with a park-through hamburger lunch.